swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
So many bounce houses so little time
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize