Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I smell like Dick and happiness
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
