after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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