Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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