So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
