some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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