He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
