Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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