Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
