i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I checked into jail on foursquare
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
