she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
