if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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