hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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