pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
