i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize