You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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