Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
