Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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