she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
How does one acquire holy water?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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