Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
