did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
