areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
