I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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