I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
