Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
