they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
