The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
