I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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