I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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