We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
