we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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