Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Randomize
