You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize