i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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