PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
