Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
he shaved USA in his pubs
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
