I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
