Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
wow bdsm is so cute
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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