Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
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