I want you more than these girls want KFC
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
