I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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