We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
