My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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