Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
