Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize