you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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