I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
