i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
