I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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