She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
It was like giving head to a cactus.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Text me some of your sweat
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