Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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